Thanks to my newfound internet porn addiction, I often forget to plan enough time to cook. Ok that’s not true, sometimes I just don’t want to cook, but that sounded believable right? When I was gainfully employed, in an effort to lay down a solid, alcohol-absorbing food base, I used to visit my local Subway for dinner every Friday night.

Subway, at least this Subway, is fucking dead on Friday night. Rather than pay a bunch of retarded high school students to work a shift which couldn’t turn a profit, the owner would staff the restaurant by himself on Friday nights, normally propped up at a back booth with a newspaper. After a couple of months, the owner and I developed a certain rapport and we would debate politics while I waited for my buddies to call me with our party location. One night, the owner gave me a stack of the “free drink and chips with the purchase of a sandwich” coupons he distributed to our neighborhood once a year. Now that I’m poor, these coupons make Subway an occasionally acceptable place to eat, though the $5+tax still hurts the bottom line.

On my most recent trip to the restaurant, they had signs advertising their new buffalo chicken sub. I am, as all men should be, a pretty huge fan of buffalo sauce, so I gave it a try.

The Sandwich

Foot-long Whole Wheat Bread
Buffalo Chicken
American Cheese
Tomato Slices
Green Peppers
Crushed Red Pepper
Parmesan
Oregano

The Subway employee tried to put “low-fat ranch” on the sandwich, but I refused – I’ve never been a guy who dips his buffalo wings, I’m a buffalo sauce purist.

At first glance, even though I had it toasted, the sandwich looks pretty sad and soggy. This doesn’t impact the potential deliciousness of the sandwich, but it does allow a piece of chicken to escape the bottom when I first pick it up. The chicken appears to be the same kind that Subway used in the Chicken Pizziola sub, which I find significantly better than their “Oven Baked” chicken breast.

Done with my examination, I shove a large bite into my mouth, conscious that I would be later reviewing the sub, doing everything I could to “experience” the taste. The buffalo sauce isn’t terrible, though it lacks spice and is too vinegary. The latter flaw shouldn’t be all that surprising as Subway has made a commendable effort to limit the amount of fat in the sauce (most good buffalo sauces contain a ton of butter). The lack-of-spice is probably Subway’s effort to market the sandwich towards the general public, which I shouldn’t hold against them, but I do. I’m sure the quality of the chicken is dubious, but the small chunks prevent me from noticing, it tastes just like chicken breast.

On the whole, the sandwich is good – especially for Subway. The chicken chunks mix well with the green peppers, the oregano really pulls it all together. Until they pull the sandwich from the market, it will be my, and it should become your, “normal” Subway order.